Continuing With Anonymous

The Lady continues:

What I don't understand about "belief" is that it seems a requisite only for good things. As I understand "the Law" it is in operation 24/7 whether or not we are even aware of it. E.g. "I will never be certain that it was not some woman treading in the winepress who started that subtle change in men's mind." Neville goes on and on about "not recognizing our own harvest." Its seem the bad things happen effortlessly. People manifest all day long, with no conscious awareness of or belief in the process or mechanics of it.

But when it comes to good things, desires, things we want, then it's all these conditions that must be met, some of which are difficult to impossible for some people, given their circumstances. State akin to sleep, feel it solidly real, MUST be from first person perspective, no distractions (do you live in a noisy city?), be there now, no shred of doubt permitted. Loyalty, even if it takes years. It's vexing, quite honestly.

I'm not fully understanding your paragraph where you said God wouldn't touch you regarding tongues. One fault and you're out? I guess I'm out then. My faults are many, I'm sure. Since I was a child, I've felt rejected by God. And just as you said of yourself, I believed that because I WAS/AM. What I don't understand is, if "I am God" how can I relinquish self-control anyway? Are we the operant power? Or is it as the traditional church teaches, there's you AND God?

The weird thing is, before I ever heard anything of causative imagining, long ago I would have very vivid, solidly real daydreams, with myself experiencing it in first person, then coming out of it and feeling the "shock" Neville talks of, of being back in the actual reality. I mean I really did it effortlessly. None of it ever came to pass. None of it. Is it because I did not have the conscious awareness/belief that I was selecting a new reality? People do that all the time, not having the conscious awareness/belief that they are selecting a new reality - hence "not recognizing their own harvest." And I can't seem to do it anymore. I feel broken. Dead inside.

Can you tell me how you interpret the book of Romans, Chapter 9? Specifically where it gets to the vessels or honor and dishonor part?
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Dear ?,

Ever have a limb fall asleep, maybe from having your whole body weight against it while you were vividly daydreaming? The limb was still 100 percent you even though it was asleep from having its lifeblood cut off from it. You were conscious of it, especially while it tingled waking up, but it was not conscious or responsive to you. This is an imagic world, and that is an image of the sleep we are in from having our lifeblood, God's consciousness, cut off from us. We are still 100 percent God and he is conscious of us, but we are asleep in this unresponsive body.

I read the Bible much differently than John Calvin. He read it literal and historical, I read it as applying psychologically to just one man: me. John thought there were people involved. There is: me.  I am all of them in one way or another. I am the spirit conscious person and the flesh that shall die, dead already in sins (deviations from what is good and right). What I imagine 24/7 of this world is always coming into regrettable manifestation automatically. The spirit me has to go against the grain and force deviation from the mess the Egyptian is creating by following the technique. Vexing only until you get used to it.

Not I was out, my flesh is ALWAYS out. Mine, yours, and everyone else's flesh is always in offense. You ask about vessels of honor and vessels of dishonor. My spirit is a vessel and my flesh is a vessel. Guess which one is which. John just seriously misread the Bible because the church doesn't have a freaking clue as to how to read it, what it means by what it says. Try reading it from Victor Alexander's translation from the ancient Aramaic (http://www.v-a.com/bible/supporters/letters/rom-9.html). Jacob is all of our inner men and Esau is all of our fleshes. The Children of the Kingdom are the spirits which rejoice in God's faithfulness. They receive mercy, the flesh is designated to die. My inner man's submission to its self-control is what I had to chuck out, submitting then to God. The operant power was accepted. Your "inner man" is a vessel of honor YHWH is cultivating to bear his own glory.

Calvin read "It is appointed for man once to die," as "once to live." We are of our inner nature eternal spirit: we all died in Christ ONCE at the beginning. We keep popping up in various lives because God has an agenda, a purpose for all this: we are bit by bit being transformed into his likeness as that spiritual nature is generated in us by our having to deal with the stupidity of the flesh. Egypt gets destroyed while Israel comes out with all the gold.

The church often says things correctly and understands them incorrectly. There is us AND God, yes, but there is no separation, like you and your sleeping hand. Believe me, you WANT the hand to wake up so that you can use it. You are not going to cut it off and discard it just because it is asleep, are you? No, you shake it and slap it around until the blood starts circulating again.

Perhaps our vividly solid and real daydreams do not come to pass because we pursue something else and believe that. Unfortunately, we believe junk and have to pursue good on purpose.

BTW: I would be remiss if I were not to suggest that if you have depression you need to be seen by a qualified physician for hormonal and/or neurological imbalances. I hope you don't need medicines, but I am just a blogger. I cannot counsel you past physical needs you might have. I hope there is a spiritual breakthrough, but even that might come through easier if your body chemicals are in balance.