Conversations For DeBorah's Healing

I have become involved with a young woman's project to get healed, or perhaps I should say to find out how to heal herself. She has been a quadriplegic since 1990, when a drunk-driver caused accident damaged her spinal cord. She believes in healing, has seen enough of it and has heard enough testimonies. She has read all the causative imagination literature, but for all her praying and imagining she sits, still, in a wheelchair. Her question is, "What am I missing?"

Maybe you, dear reader, can help. If you see something I am missing or have misstated, or have an idea or perspective you would share that might help DeBorah get her legs back under her, please feel free to contribute via e-mail (imagicworldview@aol.com [yeah, I am that old]) or the comments section below. Let's get DeBorah healed!


Hello, Dan Steele,

You wrote a very interesting post about "I am that I am" in Exodus, and you mention Neville Goddard. Have you read any of his work?

DeBorah
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Hello, DeBorah,

Yes, I have read everything written by him and most of the transcripts of his lectures. I have listened to the basic 130 or so lectures available on youtube.com several times over. I was always amazed at how something new appeared in the lectures every time I listened to them. These were the impetus for many of my early posts on this site. Do you have a question?

Dan Steele
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Dan,

After spending years reading the bible, I thought God was powerful enough to heal, but traditional Christianity wasn't ANY help, and Benny Hinn isn't really healing people. NOW I have read Neville's books and lectures repeatedly since 2009 to prove that God can heal and isn't selective, but to no avail. I know so many people that serve God and read their bible daily, yet their lives are in horrible states. I left religion in 2008, and now I just want to prove that there is a God in my life without the hypocrisy of church. I just can't seem to figure out what I'm doing that isn't working.

DeBorah
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DeBorah,

Give me time with this, please. I am with you 100 per cent. I got into this search myself because I knew people who had been healed, myself included, and my mother died. I have been healed in that I watched my shorter arm grow out, and twice the pain in my back, once from a hyper-extended disc and once from arthritis, disappeared. Each time the method was different from the others. Charles Hunter simply asked Jesus to heal from the pulpit; elders placed their hands on my back and gave them to Jesus for him to heal me by; and most recently, I simply asked the Intelligence that is Power to heal my shoulder and neck pain. I just said in a deep appreciation of that Intelligence, "You can heal me," and the pain went away that very moment.

I wish I could bottle it. My New Testament professor said, "The Kingdom of God has to do with attitudes." The "Kingdom" of God is his Power -- the ACTION of the Ineffable's intelligence that is power. The night I asked that Intelligence to heal me, I had all of that picture in my head as one thing: the Ineffable, God (us) as Its action, his intelligence, and its power. All together as one big glob -- an organism. With recognition, acceptance, humility, and gratitude, I struck the attitude required for the action. Even if I hadn't been healed, I would have been satisfied with just knowing the truth I perceived in that moment. Healing was icing on the cake. In fact, it was Him saying, "Yes, you are correct."

Neville says to catch the mood. The mood of what you want is an inner feeling that is found, an aspect of the imagination you somehow strike like posing a dream. Have you read page 19 of The Law and the Promise, of the woman who suffered pain since childhood from falling wrong from a swing? She did not easily find the feeling of the wind in her hair and the sensations of swinging, jumping and falling correctly for her mother in her imagination, but when she did find it and repeated it over and over, she recovered.

I do not know if you can find the mood, the feeling of driving by the site of your accident with no incident, or if you can just ask the Intelligence that is Power to heal you like I did. I do know that the whole deal has to do with God's cultivation of a necessary attitude of faith within you.

I do not mean to burden you, blame you, put the onus on you, or any such thing. I am just saying that the cultivation of YOU to his likeness is so precious to God that this stuff -- our afflictions, sufferings, futility, and even our "death" -- are relatively inconsequential to him. HE WANTS HIM! That sounds harsh, but he knows that we are eternal beings (we are him, actually), and there is no real death. Our lives are just events of becoming bit by bit more like Him.

I agree with Neville, that God gave His Son once at the beginning into all this suffering. He became us that we might become more like God. Each of us are the "world" He loved so much that He gave His only begotten Son, and He is angling for attitudes like His to be formed in us. He loves his nature so, for it is the best for us. This is the "Law" that Neville talks about, the very nature of God that is to be formed in us: thinking, love, gratitude, humility, faith -- all the facets and aspects Raymond Holliwell writes about in Working With the Law.

I am glad you wrote and asked, and I hope I have not bored you. You are on the right track: surrendering yourself to Him is what it is about -- not churching and tithing and ritual. I must say, though, that getting our minds to do what we want it to is easier said than done. How nice to have God here with us, in us, and even AS us to help us get it done. Ask Him and see where His imaginings lead you.

Like I said, give me time with this. I would love to see you healed, and would love to be part of your finding the road to it (I fantasize learning myself and then living again with my mother to teach her). God Bless.

Dan Steele
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Dan,

Thank you for answering my email Dan. You're the first person that didn't just regurgitate Neville's words back to me when I asked them a question. Dr. Joseph Murphy, Reverend Ike, Emmet Fox, Ernest Holmes, are other authors that I have read, but mainly I read Neville Goddard because I feel empowered. Many events in my life have been scary as you noted. However, with the pruning shears I've lessened the severity of them during my inner conversations. Any guidance will BE greatly appreciated. Admittedly it's very difficult to realize that I am the cause of the states my life has gone through. Walking again would not only heal my body but also my mind AND set me free. I look forward to reading your reply.

DeBorah
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DeBorah,

It is my pleasure to communicate with you, and I am hoping for you. You will understand that I am not always on computer and e-mail. I try to check regularly. The authors you mention are the right sphere to be seeking in. I might mention T. L. Osborn, also. There were a lot of his overseas campaigns on youtube. If you watch any of them, you can fast-forward to where he starts preaching. Always fascinating to me. You have to translate his expectation of an outside God to act to the inner man in each of us becoming aware that he or she is God. Healings are a knock on the head with a two-by-four that say, "Yes, you are God, and I am HERE!" For when it works, you have found him!

I am not very familiar with Emmet Fox because my former Christian leaders warned me against him. I take that as an endorsement now. I did read The Golden Key online, which is to forget what you want and instead lift praise and worship to God. 'Praise' is everything you know about him. You may have read my post about Janet Gunther, my friend and neighbor who gave me tuberculosis. She was having a personal time of praise and worship in her living room. In her contemplation of the wondrousness of God, she got lifted up in emotions to where she felt she was actually in heaven worshiping before Him, and the Life was present within her and flowing through her. She heard a distinct voice say, "You are healed." She went to her next checkup and yes, she was healed -- the hole in her lung was filling in with new material. She had Golden Keyed herself. And I had to take anti-tuberculosis medicine for the next half year!

Keep Him in mind. Imagine yourself dancing with Him.

Dan Steele
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Dan,

Healing from tuberculosis -- just any healing period is amazing. Sometimes I just wish I could touch people on their shoulders and they could just get up off their wheelchairs.

DeBorah
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DeBorah,

You can imagine those people well, which is what you would be doing in your mind while touching their shoulders. Imagining someone else well is an outpouring of love and faith, no? I think it is a good exercise. How would they feel if they were healed? Try to feel that.

I wanted to share one other thing. It is hard to explain, but I am sure that it is there. It is an attitude or state of mind related to surrender. I receive Guideposts Magazine, and I see it in many of the stories. It is when we give up. Been praying and hoping for years to no avail, and finally just up and say, "Okay, Lord, I have been praying for this breakthrough for years and it hasn't gotten me anything. Maybe you don't want it for me. Whatever you do want for me is fine and dandy with me." And then exactly what they have been endeavoring for for years occurs. Have you seen this?

It is something of a head-knocker: "I want it, and can't get it. Then I give up on it, and you give it to me." Wanting is the Catch 22 of the spiritual realm. Neville Goddard, Joe Vitale, and several others have pointed out that what we imagine is what we generate into manifestation. If we imagine wanting (or if wanting is our imagining), we generate the manifestation of wanting. And on we go, wanting and wanting and wanting. It says to me that the nature of God includes an element of release to whatever happens. I said in a recent post that the Intelligence-that-is-Power-to-become-what-is-imagined imagined the particulate existence of the Paradise, and thus the "Big Bang." We have a universe on the way to Paradise, but most of it is wandering gases and dark energy -- particles of manifested Intelligence that are just floating in abeyance, waiting for the opportunity to become what they were manifested for. Eternity is a really long time, and the Eternal One is patient. He doesn't sweat waiting. He is reaaaally patient. But then again, he doesn't mind our saying, "'Excuse me, a little help here, please," because our becoming the Paradise is what he is after -- the mature Manifestation of his own emanation.

Yes, you are that, and you are getting close. Lord, a little help here, please.

Dan Steele
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Dan,

I have heard of people giving up and then receiving exactly what they were asking for. I have tried that on occasion. I believe I panic. I think maybe God forgot that this is what I want after 20 plus years. I don't think that God has forgotten. There's just something I'm missing. You're right about seeing people healed in my mind's eye.

DeBorah
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DeBorah,

Something came to mind about you and I forgot to mention it. It was to imagine yourself as an actor in a play in which you have gotten what you desire-- to pretend that you are that actor in the play. That is the perspective you are looking for: "I am that actor." And then put yourself in the play and experience and sense her vision, hearing, and feelings walking, dancing, climbing, running, kicking.

Another thing is, have you read my posts about Exodus 3: 14 and Genesis 1: 1-2? I have been hitting Exodus 3: 14 for a couple of years, and more recently realized that Genesis 1: 1-2 says the exact same thing. I only realized this because I read the translation from the ancient Aramaic (the first language of the Bible) according to a mystical Jewish manner of reading. Not everyone's cup of tea. There is a "him" mentioned in each verse -- third person singular. In Exodus 3: 14, God says the he is this third person's becoming. In Genesis 1: 2, it says that the earth was for "him" and by "him" -- the same third person. The third person is ourselves when we become mature. This is the "his excellence" (Jethro) that enchanted Moses. Moses saw our future in Exodus chapter three -- the man.

You see, God has not forgotten; he is engineering. You think that you have caused your life. You act out of compulsion. There is a state of mind, an attitude, an emotion of joy or gratitude or awe that you are seeking, and it might not include healing. It might just surpass healing in its grandeur and worth to you. Like I said, healing is just icing on the cake of revelation.

Another fellow you might not know of is Father Bede Griffiths: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zYEFgrc6Lc. I think you will like him. I learned about advaita from him, "Not one, but not two."

Dan Steele
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Dan,

The idea of not healing sends me into a tailspin, and then there's everyone whose lives are put on hold having to take care of me that could be freed as well as me, which would finally give me an opportunity to live a life filled with light and fun instead of scariness.

DeBorah
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DeBorah,

Sorry. I didn't want to put scariness on you. Was my poor attempt to lift your mind to a higher state: the thought of what, in your mind, could be so grand that healing would pale in comparison?

Dan Steele
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Dan,

Looking forward to your post. Maybe you can help me understand how scariness would elevate me to a higher level because I am not comprehending at the moment.

DeBorah
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DeBorah,

No, 'scariness' was an association you brought in. I am hunting for a way to introduce a perspective or frame of mind that doesn't have God as a big old shiny guy with long hair sitting on a big chair on a glass sea surrounded by worshipers. There are invisible forces which create and form the world. You are, I hope, familiar with the concept of a spectrum: shine one light through a prism and it breaks into a bar of all its elements -- a display of all the ingredients it is comprised of. I imagine God in this way: I see a vertical spectrum with the Ineffable Source of everything in the spectrum at the top. Descending from the top is the Ineffable's imagining, that action of the Ineffable we call 'God.' This is consciousness of being -- not of being anything in particular, but just being -- simple awareness. Then we have awareness of intelligence, of power, of intent of the Ineffable, Man, and all the stuff/actions it takes to manifest Man.

All of the stuff in the spectrum is the Ineffable. We are among the forces that are included in making up Man, albeit we are at the bottom of the spectrum. What man shall be has already been determined, and as such already exists in the mind of God. The invisible force we call Jesus Christ is the Life-giving, Living Branch or emanation of the Ineffable. He is not a dude standing by a big guy in a chair, but is the force of the Ineffable to make us into the man, the perfect emanation of Itself. Sorry you asked?

"Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, to-day, and forever," is the invisible force that heals thousands at crusades and services and in homes as a warm greeting: "Yes, I am here." I admire your gumption to find him. I know that I am him, and you are him -- we are all the same One. And every morning I wake up saying, "I love you, Jesus." There is no distance to him. We are him on the way to becoming the manifestation of Him. The soup is not done yet.

That invisible force is in you right now. Neville likened it to a golden, liquid light in our being, in the solar plexus and brain. May I recommend that as you approach slumber you imagine the invisible force that is God -- Jesus Christ, the Life, the Ineffable -- as a light within you, and that you love it and appreciate it. It is you and you are it. And aside from that appreciation, that you imagine the day you just had as you would have spent it if you could walk and do all the things you want to do? This is kind of a big assignment: combine joy, appreciation, and purpose. And somewhere along the line, try to get up, starting with your weakest point (starting with your strongest isn't faith that you have received).

Dan Steele
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Dan,

I am glad that I asked and your answer is impeccable. Thank you for your time.

DeBorah
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Dan,

When you have time, would you please share your healing story? Especially the part about being your arm grow right before your very eyes? I would greatly appreciate appreciate the encouragement, because I think it is time for me to call God on the carpet so to speak as Reverend Ike would say.

DeBorah
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DeBorah,

I have written about it somewhere on my blog. I took a quick look for "Charles" on Blogger. I guess I have written about the experience a dozen times or so. It is one of my anchor points ("This I KNOW!").
http://imagicworldview.blogspot.com/2015/12/imaginal-is-not-imaginary-it-is-medium.html
http://imagicworldview.blogspot.com/2015/11/lets-get-you-successful-together.html
http://imagicworldview.blogspot.com/2015/08/write-your-own-bible.html
Enjoy and, I hope, be encouraged.

Dan Steele
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DeBorah,

I still think about what you might be missing, too.* When Charles Hunter asked everyone to compare the lengths of their limbs and asked Jesus quite directly to make them all the right length, I concentrated only on not moving whatsoever. I heard Charles praying, but I only concentrated on watching closely and not moving at all. I saw my left hand's finger tips move forward about 1/2 to 5/8's of an inch to match the right hand. I didn't feel a thing. There were several people who had significant differences on the stage (this was at the Melodyland Christian Center's Charismatic Clinic). One woman who had one leg four inches shorter than the other was standing there with 4" of her ankle sticking out of her pantsuit. She was laughing because all she wore were pantsuits and she needed a whole new wardrobe. Can't say her husband was as happy.

One thing to remember is that God will not be put into a box. I know people were healed in T. L. and Daisy Osborn's ministry. Fascinating to me is one video in particular where T. L. is still praying for one woman after others had been healed. He repeats verse after verse to her of the promises he claims for healing in his ministry. She is standing there waiting for God to heal her. T. L. is reciting the verses. She doesn't get it. She thinks he is announcing an outside God who is going to do something spectacular. She waits patiently. He is proclaiming the inside God who has done something spectacular. T. L. finally has to ask her to sit down.

There are any number of techniques of healing. Largely, it has to do with one's frame of mind. People at healing services generally are just there with some sense of belief and expectation. They sit there or stand at the alter with blank stares like deer stuck in the headlights. I wonder if the blankness has to do with submission. My friend Janet at Melodyland School of Theology was in a private devotional. She was contemplating the glorious things she knew about God (do I hear, "Emmet Fox's Golden Key?"), and got so caught up in it that she felt that she was literally -- not figuratively -- at the throne of God among the angels and throngs of saints worshiping Him. With a heart about to burst of love and adoration, she HEARD a voice say, "You are healed." Ever notice how God likes three-word sentences? Not a rule: I said, "You can heal me." Four.

Abdullah and Neville gave us a technique: "You are . . . " You have listened to God's Law and His Promise how many times? Neville told Abdullah, "I want to go to Barbados." Abdullah said, "You are IN Barbados!" Neville lived and slept in Barbados in his mind for a month. The woman I mentioned in The Law and the Promise (page 19) took a long time and a lot of effort to get to the point where she was a little girl again feeling the wind in her hair and the sensation of swinging. Neville took time and effort to get to where he could feel himself climbing the gangplank of the ship he needed to sail on. I know you know all this, but have you been able to BE the actor on the stage of YOUR play, wherein you play the part of having been healed and feel all the things of there and then over and over and over? That is a tall, order, isn't it?

I think you might want to create a checklist of things for healing: submission, gratitude, nobility, adoration, a scene to be sensed of a situation after having been healed, the perspective looking from that place, thinking FROM that place, feeling and seeing and hearing over and over and over and over again, sleepy/drowsy state, return to unconditioned awareness (Your Faith is Your Fortune) -- all the things that seem to go into causation by imagination. Napoleon Hill adds one thing in The Law of Success, and that is the price you will pay for success. He throws that into the mix from left field without any further explanation. I can only think that Hill became an evangelist of Success as his payment. Might have something to do with putting one's "hand to the plow."

Dan Steele
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Thank you, Dan. As much I want to be healed a part of me wants to give up, because I'm just drowning in self doubt and fear even though I daily read positive authors and say affirmations. There's no clear answer. I just want to feel whole.

DeBorah
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You can't give up, because if you give up, you will just be gived-up. You need your own Twelve-Step one-day-at-a-time attitude: "Just this one day, I will succeed."
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I did exactly that by making a list of successes and wrote about my feelings. This exercise I will do again. I cannot give up. You're right.
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DeBorah,

I am sure it is hard to suspend self-doubt and fear. I want to add to the previous e-mail something interesting about the woman on the swing. For her, the accident never happened. In her imagination, she went back to the past  and convinced herself that she had ever landed correctly -- she had never twisted her back! Can you remember the day of your accident? The smell of the car, the sound of the motor, the rattle going down the street, shifting gears, the music on the radio, the things you saw out the windows, the conversation you had with friends? and the other driver? You changed lanes and drove right by him. Never really noticed the guy! No condemnation to him, because THE ACCIDENT NEVER HAPPENED! Your day just went on. You got to say hi! to the person you were going to see.

It wouldn't cost you much to go to sleep in that event-less passing, passing the person who hit you over and over and over, until that moment of passing or the greeting after is your present and continuous reality.

Dan Steele
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* See http://imagicworldview.blogspot.com/2016/03/deborah-how-i-removed-block-i-could-not.html