Heading For Healing 15: the Strait Gate/ Narrow Door
Let me tell you about my experience in the strait gate. The strait gate is a constricting passage you have to fit through. It is not comfortable. It is a one-on-one interview with God you have to go through, man-to-man as it were. It can get real tight. There is no one there but you and God.
It happened to me 1975, in the Fellowship Center of Grace Bible Church in Honolulu, Hawai'i. I had gone to an evening performance there with a friend from the House of Praise in Kaimuki. He had gone into the Fellowship Center with ministers of the church to pray for the gift of tongues. I waited in the foyer reading notices on their bulletin board and playing with the handle of the drinking fountain. Raphael, my friend, was taking some time. One of the ministers came over and asked if I had received the gift of tongues, and if I'd like to pray for it as well.
I had been saved a couple or few weeks earlier at the House of Praise, but nothing had happened to me. The other guy who got up to accept Jesus broke out crying and speaking in tongues. Would I like to receive that? Okay. As far as I could tell, everyone at the House of Praise spoke in tongues, except for maybe Raphael and me.
I knelt as directed at a folding chair and prayed, giving God my tongue to use by His Holy Spirit. Nothing happened. I gave God my lips, too, and my breath. And my jaw. I gave God my muscles, my larynx, my volition to speak, my body, my future, any kids I might have in the future. Nothing happened. I realized that I was rejected of God. I had accepted Him, but He had not accepted me. "He who comes to Me," is what is in play here. I had not actually come to Jesus yet, but I'm getting way ahead of myself.
I had come to truly believe in God by this time. I had encountered a for-real deceiving spirit, had had my mind's eye miraculously opened by Jesus, had my mother's best friend's testimony of a miraculous healing, and was dead-set that God was alive and aware and here . . . and rejecting me. Rather than just kicking the process to the curb and walking away dejected, I got really, really serious. I desperately wanted to know WHY I was rejected and how to get myself unrejected. I WAS REALLY, REALLY CONSTRAINED, REACHING DESPERATELY FOR SOME INKLING OF WHAT THIS UNKNOWN THING WAS. I was on my knees sobbing, searching for what I did not know. And no one could tell me except God Himself!!
THAT, my friend, is the strait gate and the narrow door: mano y mano with God, NOT accepted and trying to GET accepted.
Well, I had given everything I was, had, and would ever have to God already. What else does He want? I entered what I suppose was a trance. In my imagination I saw a world in front of me I knew wasn't there. WHAT I SAW WAS GOD'S SPEECH. A big block blocking me. I knew it was what had to go out from me, but I didn't know what it was. No signs; no words; I just couldn't go on. HOW CAN I GIVE WHAT I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS? A brilliant idea! And a gamble: I said to God in my mind (I think), "Lord, I don't know what it is, but whatever it is, I give it to you." That was risky, because I had absolutely no idea what I was giving up or getting myself into, BUT I WAS WILLING TO BUY IT TO FIND GOD.
The block disappeared, and I was down where I saw mud made into a man's body. He took off to take care of his life. He had a lot of important things to do: find a place to spend the night, to build a fire, to find food, etc.. BAMM!! It hit me like a sledgehammer: the mud-man was me. I had spent my life taking care of myself and all my own concerns. My life, though, WAS GOD’S! It was His Spirit which animated this mud. I had robbed Him of all the use He would have gotten from me if had been available for whatever purpose He had created me FOR. I had never asked. I had never as much as said, "Thank you." God had by His grace made me to live, and I had stolen the life He had given me. It wasn't life FOR me; it was me alive for HIM. And I had in ignorance rebelled.
A thief, a rebel, an outcast. I was really finding out what constriction was. I was CRUSHED. No wonder God wouldn't accept me: I hadn't really come to Him fully open. I had "given" myself to Him with reservation: if I did not like what He did with me, I was going to take myself back! Now I realized that He OWNS me. I can't give what I do not own, and I had NOTHING. All I could do was to accept my state and submit myself to Him in complete abandonment to Him. My self-lordship had to go. I cast my self-lordship and self-control out of myself to complete surrender and abandon, and listened. What do you want me to do? I am not moving a muscle until you tell me what muscle to move, and what you want me to do.
I'd still be living at Grace Bible Church if God hadn't said, "Remember this, and it is all right." I was accepted, and Glory filled my soul up to my throat, where it came out as tongues of praise and love and adoration and gratitude. I had gotten through the strait gate!
___________________________________________
Some other notes:
The Jewish man we call Jesus Christ entered his relationship with God through what he called the difficultly-narrow door. He tells us to do the same: "Enter through the narrow door, for wide is the door, and broad is the path that leads to oblivion, and numerous are those who go that way (that go by it). But it is the constricting door and the narrow path that lead to life everlasting, and few are those that find it" (Matthew 7:13-14 Alexander).
From a website:
"As Christ laid down His life, so must the seekers and knockers at the gate forfeit their lives (Matt. 16:25) to enter the kingdom. As one stands before the strait gate he surrenders everything to the Lord that he might gain entrance. Having become penitent and broken by Holy-Ghost conviction, there is no plea bargaining and no reservations stipulated. With a broken heart and contrite spirit (Ps. 34:18) one divests himself of his fleshly baggage on the world side of the strait gate. He does this willingly because his heart is being made new. He now knows that there is no other way unto salvation. He resolves to forsake the world and all its lusts, deny self, take up his cross, and follow the Lord Jesus. This he promises to do until his dying breath. This latter promise pertains to walking the narrow way."
Narrow Is The Gate: What Did Jesus Mean?
It happened to me 1975, in the Fellowship Center of Grace Bible Church in Honolulu, Hawai'i. I had gone to an evening performance there with a friend from the House of Praise in Kaimuki. He had gone into the Fellowship Center with ministers of the church to pray for the gift of tongues. I waited in the foyer reading notices on their bulletin board and playing with the handle of the drinking fountain. Raphael, my friend, was taking some time. One of the ministers came over and asked if I had received the gift of tongues, and if I'd like to pray for it as well.
I had been saved a couple or few weeks earlier at the House of Praise, but nothing had happened to me. The other guy who got up to accept Jesus broke out crying and speaking in tongues. Would I like to receive that? Okay. As far as I could tell, everyone at the House of Praise spoke in tongues, except for maybe Raphael and me.
I knelt as directed at a folding chair and prayed, giving God my tongue to use by His Holy Spirit. Nothing happened. I gave God my lips, too, and my breath. And my jaw. I gave God my muscles, my larynx, my volition to speak, my body, my future, any kids I might have in the future. Nothing happened. I realized that I was rejected of God. I had accepted Him, but He had not accepted me. "He who comes to Me," is what is in play here. I had not actually come to Jesus yet, but I'm getting way ahead of myself.
I had come to truly believe in God by this time. I had encountered a for-real deceiving spirit, had had my mind's eye miraculously opened by Jesus, had my mother's best friend's testimony of a miraculous healing, and was dead-set that God was alive and aware and here . . . and rejecting me. Rather than just kicking the process to the curb and walking away dejected, I got really, really serious. I desperately wanted to know WHY I was rejected and how to get myself unrejected. I WAS REALLY, REALLY CONSTRAINED, REACHING DESPERATELY FOR SOME INKLING OF WHAT THIS UNKNOWN THING WAS. I was on my knees sobbing, searching for what I did not know. And no one could tell me except God Himself!!
THAT, my friend, is the strait gate and the narrow door: mano y mano with God, NOT accepted and trying to GET accepted.
Well, I had given everything I was, had, and would ever have to God already. What else does He want? I entered what I suppose was a trance. In my imagination I saw a world in front of me I knew wasn't there. WHAT I SAW WAS GOD'S SPEECH. A big block blocking me. I knew it was what had to go out from me, but I didn't know what it was. No signs; no words; I just couldn't go on. HOW CAN I GIVE WHAT I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS? A brilliant idea! And a gamble: I said to God in my mind (I think), "Lord, I don't know what it is, but whatever it is, I give it to you." That was risky, because I had absolutely no idea what I was giving up or getting myself into, BUT I WAS WILLING TO BUY IT TO FIND GOD.
The block disappeared, and I was down where I saw mud made into a man's body. He took off to take care of his life. He had a lot of important things to do: find a place to spend the night, to build a fire, to find food, etc.. BAMM!! It hit me like a sledgehammer: the mud-man was me. I had spent my life taking care of myself and all my own concerns. My life, though, WAS GOD’S! It was His Spirit which animated this mud. I had robbed Him of all the use He would have gotten from me if had been available for whatever purpose He had created me FOR. I had never asked. I had never as much as said, "Thank you." God had by His grace made me to live, and I had stolen the life He had given me. It wasn't life FOR me; it was me alive for HIM. And I had in ignorance rebelled.
A thief, a rebel, an outcast. I was really finding out what constriction was. I was CRUSHED. No wonder God wouldn't accept me: I hadn't really come to Him fully open. I had "given" myself to Him with reservation: if I did not like what He did with me, I was going to take myself back! Now I realized that He OWNS me. I can't give what I do not own, and I had NOTHING. All I could do was to accept my state and submit myself to Him in complete abandonment to Him. My self-lordship had to go. I cast my self-lordship and self-control out of myself to complete surrender and abandon, and listened. What do you want me to do? I am not moving a muscle until you tell me what muscle to move, and what you want me to do.
I'd still be living at Grace Bible Church if God hadn't said, "Remember this, and it is all right." I was accepted, and Glory filled my soul up to my throat, where it came out as tongues of praise and love and adoration and gratitude. I had gotten through the strait gate!
___________________________________________
Some other notes:
The Jewish man we call Jesus Christ entered his relationship with God through what he called the difficultly-narrow door. He tells us to do the same: "Enter through the narrow door, for wide is the door, and broad is the path that leads to oblivion, and numerous are those who go that way (that go by it). But it is the constricting door and the narrow path that lead to life everlasting, and few are those that find it" (Matthew 7:13-14 Alexander).
From a website:
"As Christ laid down His life, so must the seekers and knockers at the gate forfeit their lives (Matt. 16:25) to enter the kingdom. As one stands before the strait gate he surrenders everything to the Lord that he might gain entrance. Having become penitent and broken by Holy-Ghost conviction, there is no plea bargaining and no reservations stipulated. With a broken heart and contrite spirit (Ps. 34:18) one divests himself of his fleshly baggage on the world side of the strait gate. He does this willingly because his heart is being made new. He now knows that there is no other way unto salvation. He resolves to forsake the world and all its lusts, deny self, take up his cross, and follow the Lord Jesus. This he promises to do until his dying breath. This latter promise pertains to walking the narrow way."
Narrow Is The Gate: What Did Jesus Mean?
posted by Daniel C. Branham-Steele at
3:09 AM
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